Smart, Capable, and Still Avoiding Your Bank Account? Same.

When You’re Smart But Still Struggling With Money

Over the years, I’ve taught financial education classes, helped women create debt payoff strategies that actually stick, and broken down credit card fine print like it was a second language. I was that go-to person—the one with the credentials on the wall and the calm voice on the other end of the phone when money felt like too much.
And yet?
I’d still lie awake some nights thinking, How the hell am I this smart and still worried about money?

Maybe you’ve had that same thought.
You’re competent. You’re thoughtful. You’ve built a business, climbed the ladder, or held your family together through chaos, caregiving, and let’s-not-even-start-on-2020.

And now, as the world feels increasingly uncertain—politically charged, economically shaky, and saturated with fear—it’s no wonder your nervous system feels like it’s on high alert. Inflation. Elections. Climate anxiety. It’s a lot.
And money, more than ever, can start to feel like both a pressure point and a survival tool.

No one taught us how to navigate this kind of terrain. So if you’re feeling wobbly, anxious, or unsure, it’s not a sign you’re doing something wrong.
It’s a sign you’re human—in a very tender, high-stakes time.

So why does money still feel... fraught?
Why the shame spiral every time you log into your bank account?
Why the gut punch when someone casually mentions their maxed-out 401k?

It’s Not About Intelligence—It’s About What You Inherited

Here’s the truth that took me years to understand (and that no one really tells us):
Money stuff isn’t about being smart.
It’s about being human.
And being human means having a nervous system, a past, and a whole lifetime of money stories that didn’t start with you.

I still remember being 15, sitting at the kitchen table with my mom as she taught me how to balance my checkbook. It felt grown-up and important, and I was proud to know something most of my friends didn’t. But looking back, that was pretty much the beginning and end of my money education.
No conversations about emotions, no tools for planning, no context for how money actually worked in a real life.
Just numbers and math and the unspoken rule that you’d better not mess it up.

Like a lot of women, I wasn’t taught how to feel safe with money.
I was taught to survive it.
We absorb so much—our parents’ stress, society’s shame, and all the messages that say “figure it out on your own or stay small.”

And then we grew up and wondered why budgeting makes us gag, or why we can’t seem to open the damn envelope from our retirement account without needing a snack and a nap.

Let me say it clearly:
You are not bad with money.
You are not “behind”—you’re on your own timeline.
You’re exactly where your next chapter begins.

You just haven’t had the kind of support that actually makes sense for you.
You know, the kind that doesn’t involve shame, spreadsheets, or being told to cut out your favorite oat milk lattes.

So What Do You Actually Need?

What I’ve found in my years of coaching is that what most women need isn’t more “how-to.”
It’s more permission.
Permission to be messy.
Permission to feel.
Permission to learn in a way that honors your real life—and doesn’t bypass your emotional reality.

Because when you bring compassion into the conversation, when you stop blaming yourself for not knowing what no one taught you, and when you stop forcing your money life to look like someone else’s idea of success…
something softens. Something opens.

You stop white-knuckling your way through it.
You start listening.
And slowly, a different kind of relationship with money starts to take shape—
one rooted in trust, not fear.

Want to Go Deeper? Start Here.

If this is speaking to something tender in you, I want to invite you into a conversation I started recently:
👉 10 Raw + Real Money Questions Women Are Afraid to Ask
These are the questions I hear behind closed doors, the ones we’re often too accomplished or too ashamed to say out loud.
And I promise: they are so normal.

Also, if you haven’t already, take the Sacred Money Archetypes® quiz.
It’s not a gimmick. It’s a surprisingly accurate way to understand what’s going on under the surface of your money habits—and how to work with your natural tendencies instead of constantly trying to override them.

This work is not about becoming someone else.
It’s about coming home to yourself—and bringing money along for the ride.